A Date for Emily
by ilovetvalot
Summary: When JJ and Emily decide to put their heads together, hilarity is always a possibility. Emily needs a date. Can JJ help her find that perfect man?


**Author's Note: First of all, we have exciting news, my friends! Nominating ballots for "The Profiler's Choice Awards" are ready and waiting for you at the "Chit Chat on Author's Corner" forum. So please, everyone, come on over and name some of your favorite fics and authors. Lets honor our favorite stories and authors on the CM site! We want to hear from you. Rules and guidelines are also available at the forum and as always, tonnie2001969 and I would be delighted to answer any questions that you may have. Now, let's get nominating! Our first ballots are beginning to trickle in and we love hearing from each of you! **

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**And please, fellow readers and authors, stay tuned for the beginning of our monthly writing endeavor, the "Candyland Challenge" over on Chit Chat on Author's Corner forum. Details will be coming out in the next day or so.**

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**A Date For Emily**

As JJ watched her evidently unhappy friend navigate through the bustling tables in the busy diner they'd agreed to lunch at, she frowned. Waiting until Emily Prentiss reached the table, jerking her chair out and dropping into her seat with a plop, JJ asked, worriedly, "Problems, Em?"

"You have no idea," Emily said, dangling her cell phone in front of JJ, glaring at the offending object with a passion she normally reserved for overtly annoying law enforcement officers. "I received a phone call from my dear mother demanding my presence at the Black and White Ball on Friday night."

"The Black and White Ball?" JJ asked, raising an inquisitive brow, the description not one she was familiar with.

"A gala funding AIDS research," Emily sighed. "It's a worthy cause, but it also requires something I'm sadly lacking these days."

"And what's that?" JJ asked with a benevolent smile, half-way knowing which direction this discussion was heading toward.

"A date," Emily replied flatly, forcing herself to smile as a waitress approached and took their order.

Waiting until they were alone again, JJ said with twinkling eyes, "I don't consider that to be a problem at all. Not when I have four entirely eligible bachelors available and at your disposal."

"The guys?" Emily groaned, barely resisting the urge to bang her head against the faux-wood table at the thoughts of her co-workers.

"Uh huh and this is your lucky day. Each one of them owes me a favor," JJ nodded enthusiastically, taking a quick sip of her sweet tea as her mind scooted in quadruple directions. "Now, let's discuss your options."

"The only option I'm willing to consider involves me winging my way away from this gala completely," Emily countered, shaking her head as she squinted her eyes closed. "I think I can convince Hotch to send me to San Quentin or Sing Sing for a custodial interview, don't you? Nobody can fault me for doing my service to God and country, now can they?"

"If you're willing to spend a week in a maximum-security prison interviewing serial killers, you must really hate this entire shindig," JJ replied, cocking one brow as she stared at the stubborn woman in front of her. Shaking her head, she ordered, "Quit looking at this as something to be dreaded, Em! If you play your cards right, this could be the night of your life!"

"I don't know what world you're living in," Emily started, opening one eyelid to peer darkly at her entirely too chipper friend, "But my mother's soirees are not times to dance on the ceiling all night, Jayje."

"But they can be if we choose the right guy!" JJ declared, digging in her purse for her PDA. Easily tapping a few times on the screen, reaching just the file she needed, she declared, " Let's see who's schedule is open and just waiting for that special invitation."

Staring in amazement as she leaned forward, attempting to peer at the small screen, Emily asked, "You keep all of our schedules on that thing?"

"The better to know your every move," JJ winked, then smiled widely as she declared, "Okay, Rossi's definitely clear. His book tour doesn't start until next week. Want me to pencil him in for you?" JJ asked, reaching for her glass of iced tea again. Who knew being a fairy godmother would create such a thirst?

"God, no!" Emily shuddered, her shoulders almost clenching at the thought. "He slept with my mother between husband number one and husband number two," she expounded when JJ's eyebrows drew together over her glass.

Choking at that new piece of surprising information, JJ coughed, finally gasping, "What!"

Shrugging, Emily murmured, voice perfectly calm, "What can I tell you, Jay. It was the seventies."

"Good Christ," JJ mumbled, her eyes wide as she stared across the table at her friend. Obviously, there were levels to Emily's familial relationships that transcended even the wildest of imaginations!

"Besides," Emily shook her head, attempting to clear her thoughts once again, "My mother's past affairs aside, Strauss will be in attendance and we all know Rossi's rule on THAT."

"Shake it off, Jareau," JJ said aloud, shaking her head furiously as she wondered if pouring bleach in her ears might cleanse the brief memory of that information. Taking a deep breath, JJ raised her head to gaze at Emily. "Moving along, then. How about Reid? He's brilliant, educated, aaannnddd," JJ added, consulting her handy-dandy device, "most importantly, available."

"JJ," Emily said tersely, narrowing her eyes, "Would you really inflict the Ambassador AND Erin Strauss on a guy we both love like a brother in one single night?"

"Good point," JJ agreed, her lips twitching, comical visions of Spencer's possible meltdown floating in her mind. "Okay," she said, staring down at the screen in her hand, "There's Hotch. He'd be in court until five, but he's free after that. Jack's staying with his maternal grandparents that night." Glancing up at Em, she tilted her head. "It's doable. And, so is Hotch, if you know what I mean," she winked.

"Ewww! JJ!" Emily hissed, tightly clenching her eyes shut as she rapidly shook her head. "Absolutely not. He's the boss...and he's so...Hotch."

"And the complaint on that would be?" JJ asked gamely. "Come on, Em. He's hot. Tall, dark and delicious, as our pal Garcia would say."

"He's also broody and moody. AND, most importantly, he, too, hates my mother and Strauss," Emily pointed out as she cracked open one eye, taking another sip of her water.

"Em, let's face it...nobody's a real big fan of those two. Including YOU," JJ retorted on a giggle.

"Touché," Emily averred, dropping the glass with a decidedly un-ladylike plop onto the table.

"But," JJ drawled, her eyes watching the other woman closely, "There is Morgan. Strauss likes him, and if I recall, so did your mother."

"Morgan?" Emily said, wrinkling her pert nose as she forced herself to consider the option of her tall, dark and handsome coworker. Shrugging, she sighed. "He'd never agree to it."

"He owes me. He owes Garcia. And, he owes you," JJ said, ticking each name off on her fingers, then wagging all three in the other woman's direction. "He'll do it."

"You got dirt that I don't know about?" Emily asked curiously, her eyes widening as she waited for a response.

"Of course not," JJ shook her head, her eyes bright. "But Garcia does," she shared with a sly smile.

"Ah, yet again, we're saved by the Great Oracle of Quantico," Emily declared with a wide grin, raising her glass in salute to their shared absent friend.

And clinking their glasses together, the two women began to plan the downfall of one Derek Morgan.

_**Finis**_

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**__****_A/N 2 - Let me know if you would like to see the date, readers. I want to hear from you!_**


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